What do you think when you hear “approval addiction”?
Does it mean anything to you?
Should it?
Are you a victim of it?
Are you unknowingly fueling another person’s future addiction to approval?
It is not something anyone consciously decides to do.
Becoming aware of the phenomenon a decade ago at a Montessori school presentation, i set out to .parent .differently
Fast forward from 2009 to last night.
Texted a question to our son, “Do u have 1 min for a call”.
“Yeah”.
i felt compelled to tell him how proud i am of who he has become and where he is in life.
He rarely heard me say “how proud I am of you.”
There is a belief that constant approval (“I’m proud of you for ____.”) can have children and teens seek approval.
Reminded him that i (and my wife) never wanted him to become another victim.
We focused (and continue to focus) on traits, behaviors, and values. We are always impressed with his growth with personal responsibility.
We could probably use a 0ne-minute conversation with ourselves as well.
“Hey jeff, i am proud of who you’ve become and where you are in life.”
Or…
“Hey jeff, you have taken some incredible risks in the past decade and we can see your passion, persistence, and determination paying off with a freedom to do what you want when you want. Your ability to help others think differently is putting a positive dent in our Universe.”
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